Kidnapped
by Caitirin
Summary: The Shinigami is kidnapped by Oz soldiers! Boy, they had no idea what they were in for.


"_Fine_! I'll just leave! I didn't want to be here with you guys anyway!" Duo slammed the door behind him and stomped off into the street. Inside everyone else breathed a sigh of relief, finally some peace and quiet. Duo was a good friend and all, but honestly sometimes he had far too much energy. In the space of one hour Duo had annoyed Heero (which was no big feat for him) but… he had also managed to insult Wufei (albeit accidentally) _and_ bother Trowa until he asked Duo to leave _and_ cause Quatre to almost say something mean! _Quatre!_ Finally Wufei had yelled at him to just get lost and Duo stomped out. He pulled on his coat and revved his motorcycle more loudly and longer than he possibly needed to. He sped away from the house and off into the waning sunlight.

"Shouldn't we go after him?" Quatre fretted, "I mean… it's going to be dark soon…"

"Let him get lost for a while! It would be so much more peaceful. He'll find his way back when he's burned off all that extra energy." Wufei walked out into the backyard to practice katas for a while.

Heero simply grunted and turned back to his laptop, the pace of the keys resumed their previous lightning speed and Quatre turned fretfully towards Trowa, hoping for a better response.

Trowa patted the blonde boy on the head, "He'll be fine… just needs to blow off some steam. Don't worry about him; he's a Gundam pilot. He can handle himself just fine."

About half an hour down the road and a few strings of curses later, Duo was standing by the side of the road, in the rain, with his bike two miles away, out of gas. He cursed as another car thundered by splashing him with water.

"You just wait! This is no way to treat the Shinigami!" He yelled after the car. He was fuming and he was drenched and he was cold and he was not happy. This just wasn't his day. All he had wanted was a little attention from Heero. He had only threatened to unplug the laptop and Heero had pushed him out of the room with a threat of violence if he didn't find something else with which to occupy his time. So he had taken to taunting Wufei while he practiced. The dagger embedded in the wall beside his head and the threat to cut off his braid had stopped that. So he had tried to hang around with Trowa, who was reading, so Duo grabbed another book, but he couldn't sit still and his constant fidgeting caused Trowa to become annoyed, after an admirable half an hour of Duo's chatter he had rather tersely asked Duo to leave him alone. Then Duo had tried to help Quatre put the puzzle together, but with his inability to sit still he had knocked the nearly finished ten thousand-piece puzzle onto the floor, ruining it. Quatre had almost cried and then Trowa gave him a glare of death to rival Heero's. That was when he had thrown in the towel and stormed off. Damned gas tank had to be almost empty too. Damn rain… Damn cars…. Damn…

"DAMNIT!" Duo yelled at the top of his lungs."

Just then a car pulled to a stop just a short distance in front of him. He blinked and then smiled. He ran towards the car and leapt into the back seat.

"Thanks pal, I could really use a ride! Where ya headed?"

The man in the passenger seat turned around and suddenly there was a gun in Duo's face. Duo blinked as he found himself looking down the barrel of an Oz soldier's handgun.

"Eh?" Duo made a face as he realized the other passengers in the car were also similarly equipped. He made a jerk towards the door but the lock slammed shut and the car sped off. Duo groaned and slid down in the seat, well this was certainly no improvement. The driver spoke into a radio.

"Roger, pilot of Gundam 02 captured, we will bring him in for questioning."

Duo rubbed his face with his hands and stretched out his cheeks and made faces. The Oz soldier in the seat next to him gave him an odd look. Duo stuck out his tongue and the man rolled his eyes and looked out the window. Duo snickered.

"What are you laughing about?" The solider asked.

"Nothing…" Duo said rather flippantly. "Just that uniform you're wearing. Do you have any idea how incredibly stupid you look in those things? Your hats look like you've got cereal boxes on your heads." Duo reached over and tipped the hat off the man's head.

The soldier grabbed it and slammed it back on glaring at Duo.

Duo poked him in the side. The solider jumped and instantly had his gun nearly shoved up Duo's nose. Duo put his hand over the tip and pushed it down. "Hey easy there, easy. I mean I know I am the Shinigami, but have you ever heard of Death poking someone to their demise? Honestly, what kind of education do you soldiers get anyway?"

The pilot looked frustrated, it was clear he had no idea how to respond to this. He looked to the driver for guidance and was told to just ignore him and that it was probably some kind of trick.

"Well that's just rude! I mean geez, kidnap me and then ignore me! What kind of routine is this? Aren't you going to question me?"

"That's for our superiors to do." Said the man in the passenger side.

"Ahh I see, So I just have to sit her quietly until we get wherever it is we're going. Boooooorrrriiiiinnngggggg!" Duo moaned. He folded his arms across his chest for a few moments and then had a brilliant idea. He cleared his throat. "Nine billion bottles of beer on the wall! Nine billion bottles of beer, take one down…"

Several hours later, "Four million six thousand four hundred and seventy six bottles of beer on the wall! Four million six thousand…"

One day later a message reaches the safe house.

"Damnit." Heero grumbled walking downstairs. "Duo's being held hostage by Oz."

"I knew he'd been gone too long… that twit can't stay out of trouble for more than ten seconds." Wufei said shaking his head. "I guess we should've gone after him."

Quatre fretted, as he had proven he was very good at doing in the past day.

"We should probably go and get him." Trowa said.

"Yeah, we should. Prepare for a rescue mission. Only one or two of us need go. I'll take point. Wufei, you can…"h He got no further than that when the sound of screeching tires interrupted him. They ran outside. A black car pulled up, Heero pulled his gun instinctively and leveled it at the front door, prepared to fire. The back door opened and out spilled a bound and gagged, but otherwise perfectly fine Duo. An Oz soldier looking rather prematurely aged leaned out of the car reaching for the door to close it. He screamed at them with a crazed look and a slight eye twitch.

_"Take him back, please! He's driving us all MAD!"_

Duo beamed back at the man, as well as one could with duct tape over his mouth. The Oz car burned rubber to get the heck out of there.

The other four pilots blinked at Duo sitting on the lawn, rather damp, but otherwise in good spirits. They just stared for a while until Duo made some muffled noises and bounced about. It was clear he wanted help in getting untied.

Wufei obliged him and ripped the tape off.

"_OOOOWWWWW_! Hey Wu-man that hurt! Thanks!" Duo smiled widely.

"I think I liked the tape better where it was before," Wufei said folding his arms.

"Oi, Heero, lend a hand would you?" Duo looked up at Heero who was lifting an eyebrow at him.

"Duo, what just happened here?" Trowa was blinking at the black tire tracks going up the street.

"They decided they didn't really want a Gundam pilot hostage."

"They did?" Quatre looked puzzled.

"Yeah, they said I talk too much!"


End file.
